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Detective Dick Hardon; lean, mean, street-wise, and socially inept, manages to lose more partners in a week than most lose in a lifetime. With his surly female partner, Detective Birkenstock, he investigates the sniper-shooting of beloved TV Clown and Screen Actors Guild President, Milton "Uncle Spilky" Spilk. Unfortunately, a stop at hot dog stand proves deadlier than its genetically modified ingredients when Blivit the sniper shoots Dick's partner and our hero is left holding the bag - an empty to-go bag.